I have
blogged more than one year and during that time I wrote about many different
issues. Since I am a lawyer my posts are based on cases I receive or heard
about. One of the most read topics is
I cannot lie
that I asked myself why people read it more than, for example posts about friendship
or superstitious. During my research I found that every second person knows
somebody who had virtual affair and every fourth person actually had a virtual
affair. My target group were men and adult females between 18 and 50 years old
in a relationship or married.
While I was researching, I thought why this occurred?
The Internet and social networks gave many
chances, but also made disaffect people from each other.
I agree that
is seems easier to find your soul mate over a social network, you make a few
clicks, check profile, text a little and love can start, but is it really that easy?
As I wrote
in my blog, social networks gave us an opportunity to show ourselves just as we
like to be and not as we really are.
For instance,
how many people among your social network's friends are photographers, as I know every
third, but are they really photographers? Well, they bought a camera, but that does
not make them photographers.
Same is with relationship status, many of our
social network's friends are married in real life, but they express that they
are single or simply hide that.
A few months
earlier, before I wrote about virtual affair, thanks to my colleague (if I can say
thanks, yes, she had virtual affair) I had chance to text with a man who made a
fake profile for seducing women. I was surprised that he accepted to text
with me about the reasons why he created a fake profile and experienced many of his virtual affairs.
He
was in his middle 30, relative successful, married with kid and pregnant wife. He made his fake profile in his early twenties only for one purpose - seduction women. His photos were real, everything else was fake: name, country, age, status,
education.
On my question why he did all that he explained to me that he felt
again as a man, seducer, he had power over those women and was no harm for his
family. His wife never caught him in those affairs, all messaging, chatting was
during his work.
I asked him how would he feel if his wife do that the same
with some man and he explained that he will divorce.
"Cheating is cheating, no
matter is it real or virtual" he said.
Even I had despised him in this I had to agree.
Long after I
text with him I thought about those women who were his target, they were young
and old, married and single, BUT they all needed attention, they totally needed
to be loved.
Yes Internet gave us a chance to visit Peru but also change our perception
of love and romance. When I watch old movies I see men who give flowers and
candies to the woman they love, write letters and sing poems under her windows.
Do I know a woman, which husband or
boyfriend did or do that? Unfortunately, the answer is no.
Emoticons, messages,
songs from YouTube can not replace real courtship, but people believe that is
the same.
Virtual affairs exist, and I think it will be more.
Can we stop them? No. Can we accept them? Well, I do not know for you but for me affair is affair
and I can never accept that.
At this
moment while I write this post somebody read about virtual affair, searching
for excuses, thinking "mine affair is different, he/she really love me" in this
moment, men from my text is speaking with some women telling her that she is
the most beautiful women he ever saw, in this moment some woman will believe him.
Are they happy?
They think they are, but deep at heart they are just searching for real
love...
This text is authorized by Marijana Ignjatovic, and any copying is not permitted
