Friday, October 25, 2013

SINGLE LADIES - THERE IS SOMEONE SPECIAL FOR YOU OR, YOUR FAMILY WILL FIND HIM :D

"Oh dear, I didn't see you a couple of weeks, how are you, did you marry ?"

"Ahem, no"

"What?!!! 
You are not young Missy, what are you waiting for?"

                            "My bus".

To be a single lady in Serbia is like you have horns in the middle of your head, you are rare species that many of the older women will kill, bring home and put your head on the wall of their living room as a representative for their unmarried daughters.

In Serbia marriage is very important, you can be bad, without education, shame for community, but you must be married untill your 25 birth.

When you came to kindergarten first thing that your relatives will ask you is "do you have a boyfriend?"
Of course I have, just can't decide do I like more that who pee in his pants or that who cries every time his mom left him.

Then in Primary school every of your male friend is suspected. If you two are in your room your granny will suddenly come to clean the dust and your grandpa will sit between you and him to read his newspaper. They must know his intentions with you.

Secondary school. Well we are now on serious terrain, your boyfriend is already called “son in law”.
On family reunion you must say his name, date of birth, where he lives, who are his grandparents, relatives, what his parent do, what car they drive, and of course you must show him to everybody .
You can try with excuses that he is sick, but then when you two break up some of your aunts will tell you" Thx god, we started to worry, he is constantly ill, may not survive his thirtieth."

At the college after how are you, the second question is do you have serious relationship, you are now an adult problem for your family.
At this family reunion that is every time you came home, you get investigated, do you have any relationship, is it serious, if you don't have, why is that, what is wrong with you, are you a lesbian?

Your relatives now have a mission, you will not embarrass them, they will find you a decent husband!

If we are still in stone age they would take cudgels and hit on the head every man they saw , throw him in the room with you, and bring the priest, but since they can't do that they show your photo every time they saw a single man.
Of course since on each of your photos you have mini skirt, or drink in your hand, which is for your relatives very impropriate, photo of you which your relatives show, took your aunt when you didn't look, so or you have tousled hair, or you were looking somewhere like nutcase, or you were happily cleaning your teeth after aunt's dinner.

Suddenly you are invited to every wedding, even for a wedding of relatives you never saw before. You never knew even in your dream how many relatives you have, all so worried about your married career, and what is the most important "lucky" for you each of them know some single man.

At the weddings every bride will be appraised to throw the bouquet to you, for luck of course and that single guys can see that you are single too.
You will sit at the table with them just in the case they didn't see that you had caught the bouquet or if there were more single woman like you.
On every two minutes some of your relatives will hit some of that poor single men on the back with the questions " you like her, ha?"
The photographer will take a photo with each of those guys and give them to their mothers so they can visualize how you two are a beautiful couple.

That is how it looks until you are 25, then ... Well then you wait for your bus ... And ...
And maybe one day in that bus will be your future husband, or your relatives will put him there "YOU LIKE HER, HA?"...

;)

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